Julianne Harvey

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The truth of who you really are is the firmest ground to stand on.

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Expectations

Posted by Julianne Harvey on October 28, 2014 at 9:30 AM Comments comments (0)

Expectations are tricky things. We all have them - to be human means to expect something at one time or another - but I believe there is a strong correlation between happiness and lowered expectations so I am determined to keep moving in this direction.


I wish it wasn't so damn hard. I spent way too many years of my life forecasting end results so not doing this leaves me feeling unmoored. But I know it's healthier to take it as it comes ...

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A Need to Grow

Posted by Julianne Harvey on October 21, 2014 at 9:30 AM Comments comments (0)

The right to change and evolve is one every human naturally possesses. The trouble comes when some of our relationships are not flexible enough to embrace these differences.


All sorts of reasons exist for this refusal to accept growth in another person. In my experience, I have seen that when someone feels threatened or uncomfortable because I am now different, they push back by applying pressure for me to return to the way I used to beha...

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Full Circle

Posted by Julianne Harvey on October 14, 2014 at 8:30 AM Comments comments (0)

Sometimes in this life, we get a chance to come full circle in an area of our experience, and take the opportunity to measure just how far we have come. I am having one of those rare times this week, on the stunning island of Maui.


Exactly seven years ago Jason and I came here for his work reward trip, to the same resort. Back then I was an entirely different person - living with a variety of masks in place to hide my true identity from m...

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Action and Reaction

Posted by Julianne Harvey on October 7, 2014 at 10:30 AM Comments comments (0)

Waiting is a character stretch for me. To be more succinct, it's not the waiting in general that bothers me, but rather waiting for someone else to act.


It always seems to come back to control. Growing up in an alcoholic home, control was king. Now that I'm an adult, I realize that I never had any real control of people or circumstances, but I felt safer and calmer if I had the illusion of authority.


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Charting A New Course

Posted by Julianne Harvey on September 30, 2014 at 10:30 AM Comments comments (0)

Over the summer, I made some tough decisions about church. Since I was a young child, I've anchored my spiritual experience around Sunday morning church attendance. It was a non-negotiable prerequisite in the evangelical Christian world I grew up in.


Recognizing that I have choices has been the greatest discovery of my life to this point. I want to tattoo those three liberating words across my forehead so I see them in the mirror and ever...

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Fear

Posted by Julianne Harvey on September 23, 2014 at 10:30 AM Comments comments (0)

I'm tired of being run by fear. I've been thinking a lot about how limiting fear is. It fences us in on every side, taunting and terrorizing us, and we end up convinced that fear is reality.


It's not real. Fear is an important tool when it functions properly to keep us alive, but for everything else it's not only useless, but also harmful.


We develop fears slowly over time. When a shocking or upset...

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All That We Have

Posted by Julianne Harvey on September 16, 2014 at 12:30 PM Comments comments (2)

Most of my problems stem from focusing on what I lack instead of recognizing what I have. Fretting about what we are missing is a concern based in the future. Pulling our attention back to the here and now requires us to inhabit this moment to see all that is actually ours.


It's the difference between looking through the viewfinder of your camera when the image is blurry and then lightly touching the button...

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Seasons

Posted by Julianne Harvey on September 9, 2014 at 10:30 AM Comments comments (0)

Letting people down is a big trigger point for me. I hate to quit on anything, even if it's no longer working for me, because it engages buried feelings of worthlessness and shame.


Every one of us has these triggers. They are emotional springboards, vaulting us back into our childhoods where we formed concepts into cement so we could live inside of them and feel safe. I...

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Perception Can Be Changed

Posted by Julianne Harvey on September 2, 2014 at 3:00 PM Comments comments (0)

In a recent Writer's Digest article on pitching to agents and editors, this line by Tracey Barnes Priestley jumped out at me: "Stress is a matter of perception, and perception can be changed."


Our whole lives are a delicate balancing act between our perception and reality. It's far too easy to confuse the two. The bulk of our problems dwell in this space, and most of the time we are utterly unaware o...

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Love is Not a Service Contract

Posted by Julianne Harvey on August 25, 2014 at 8:25 PM Comments comments (0)

In a conversation with a friend right before I left for a 2 week vacation, she said, "You know that you don't owe people anything, right?"


This observation caught me by surprise. It left me feeling defenseless, vulnerable, even stupid, like everyone in the world knew something obvious that I was clueless about.


Generally speaking, we tend to have a str...

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