Julianne Harvey

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The truth of who you really are is the firmest ground to stand on.

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All That We Have

Posted by Julianne Harvey on September 16, 2014 at 12:30 PM Comments comments (0)

Most of my problems stem from focusing on what I lack instead of recognizing what I have. Fretting about what we are missing is a concern based in the future. Pulling our attention back to the here and now requires us to inhabit this moment to see all that is actually ours.


It's the difference between looking through the viewfinder of your camera when the image is blurry and then lightly touching the button...

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Seasons

Posted by Julianne Harvey on September 9, 2014 at 10:30 AM Comments comments (0)

Letting people down is a big trigger point for me. I hate to quit on anything, even if it's no longer working for me, because it engages buried feelings of worthlessness and shame.


Every one of us has these triggers. They are emotional springboards, vaulting us back into our childhoods where we formed concepts into cement so we could live inside of them and feel safe. I...

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Perception Can Be Changed

Posted by Julianne Harvey on September 2, 2014 at 3:00 PM Comments comments (0)

In a recent Writer's Digest article on pitching to agents and editors, this line by Tracey Barnes Priestley jumped out at me: "Stress is a matter of perception, and perception can be changed."


Our whole lives are a delicate balancing act between our perception and reality. It's far too easy to confuse the two. The bulk of our problems dwell in this space, and most of the time we are utterly unaware o...

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Love is Not a Service Contract

Posted by Julianne Harvey on August 25, 2014 at 8:25 PM Comments comments (0)

In a conversation with a friend right before I left for a 2 week vacation, she said, "You know that you don't owe people anything, right?"


This observation caught me by surprise. It left me feeling defenseless, vulnerable, even stupid, like everyone in the world knew something obvious that I was clueless about.


Generally speaking, we tend to have a str...

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Moving with the Current

Posted by Julianne Harvey on August 19, 2014 at 10:30 AM Comments comments (0)

All choices carry consequences. We decide on something and then we must bear what is associated with that choice. Sometimes it's a loss (money, time, relationships, self-esteem) and other times we end up with a gain (success, reward, confidence, joy).


Pain is at one end of the consequence continuum and elation is at the other. But we get a little of everything in between as we make our choices in life. And ...

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Locked Rooms

Posted by Julianne Harvey on August 14, 2014 at 4:00 PM Comments comments (0)

Every one of us has hidden rooms, deep in our psyche; places we don't show to anyone and that includes ourselves. In counseling, I visualize this concept as a long hallway with a series of locked doors. When the time is right, I find the key to open one door. I summon my dormant courage, fighting the fear and dread rising in my throat, and push open the door.


Each of those private rooms has been sealed off ...

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Supporting Kids Through Pain

Posted by Julianne Harvey on August 5, 2014 at 10:30 AM Comments comments (0)

How do you know when to intervene on behalf of your kids and when to let them face stress on their own? At the heart of this struggle is my desire to fix, to rescue, to save - when that is not a healthy instinct for me or for those I'm trying to liberate.


In theory, supporting kids through emotional pain is better than cutting off the source of the hurt. But why is it so tough on the parent? My old wounds m...

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Still There, Still There...Gone

Posted by Julianne Harvey on July 29, 2014 at 11:30 AM Comments comments (0)

My pastor is fond of the phrase, "The now and the not yet" to describe the tension we all live with between the present and the future. I would add in "the gone" to also incorporate the past.


I believe in synchronicity. Stuff shows up exactly when we are ready for it. Some call this 'life lessons'; I refer to it as 'getting knocked on my ass'.


We tend ...

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Doubly Good to You

Posted by Julianne Harvey on July 22, 2014 at 10:30 AM Comments comments (0)

Amy Grant has an old song called "Doubly Good to You" with this lyric, "If you find a love that's tender, if you find someone who's true, thank the Lord, he's been doubly good to you."


This line rings true for me as we approach our wedding anniversary. I think back more than a decade and a half ago, when we were young, hopeful and madly in love - embarking on the perils of life together as a married couple....

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When I Loved Myself Enough

Posted by Julianne Harvey on July 15, 2014 at 10:30 AM Comments comments (0)

"When I loved myself enough, I began leaving whatever wasn't healthy. This meant people, jobs, my own beliefs and habits - anything that kept me small. My judgement called it disloyal. Now I see it as self-loving."


This quote by Kim McMillen brought enormous comfort to me when I read it on Project Happiness' Facebook page. It calmed something in my spirit that has been distressed for some time. It was like ...

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